Being an Introvert In an Extrovert World

On a scale of 1 to 10 where 1 is sit in your room never talk to anyone introverted and 10 is the guy from Thank You for Smoking extroverted, I am a 3 or 4. I love small groups of friends. Hate large parties where I hardly know anyone. Small talk is my kryptonite. People who are not friends think I am particularly quiet not too friendly. My friends find me funny, talkative and interesting -- I think. They are also willing to let me be quiet without it having any particular connotation.

Unfortunately my job is best done by someone that is a 6 or 7. I work with senior level business executives. Sometimes one on one and other times in small groups. I also give speeches from time to time. In my line of work one needs to be "on" much of the time. I usually can gear up enough to do what I do well but when the meeting is over I am exhausted.  I suspect that one of the reasons I used to run and now bike for long periods of time by myself is that it lets me have some quiet time, some time to be reflective.

All other things being equal, I think that the world or maybe just US/European society is easier for extroverts. Making impressions quickly drives alot of what people think of you and how they react to you. We are a society that likes its stars. Very few of them come across as shrinking violets.

There is nothing inherently bad about being introverted. I have a group of good friends who know I care about them. Extreme extroverts can come across as shallow. I do feel though that so much happens in the moment that I would have missed out on less if I were more willing to get in the mix of things. Working on that part.

Maybe I will start a business. Club Introvert. CIs will become the resort destinations of choice for those that want a little more time to get to know the people around them. Activities will be geared to having people slightly push their comfort levels in getting to know new people and doing new things. There would also be areas reserved for quiet time where CIPs (Club Introvert People) can get away when they have had all they can take. No small talk allowed.

My wife is in the travel business. Maybe I can partner with her. She can sell. She's an extrovert.